Blazing Saddles
Well-Known Member
I can’t see what you’ve posted, but I was worried whether you should have been put on suicide watch.
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I can’t see what you’ve posted, but I was worried whether you should have been put on suicide watch.
icowden
Pharaoh
Of course no examples. I suspect if it's due to the AOC meme's it'll be you and your incel mates pulling your tiny plonkers.
CXRAndy
Epic Member
She is a looker, but unfortunately making blondes jokes redundant
OP
OP
Ianonabike
Guest
Just checking in to see if you all make your beds every day.
View: https://x.com/DudespostingWs/status/2016729767232540793
View: https://x.com/DudespostingWs/status/2016729767232540793
Rusty Nails
Country Member
secretsqirrel
Senior Member
OP
OP
Ianonabike
Guest
View: https://x.com/i/status/2024179102576521658
The magnificent MaryCate would've been banned pre-Musk.
AndyRM
Elder Goth
She's a prick, but has a point here. Pretending you can get a period has always baffled me.
CXRAndy
Epic Member
icowden
Pharaoh
For me, I think it depends on whether you take the late @monkers view that being a transwoman is something innate, or whether you view it as a mental health problem (the side of the coin on which I still tend to land). If we, for a moment, take the mental health problem route, it is less surprising that someone who is mentally so confused about their own body to the point that they wish to alter it, also is confused in other ways.
AndyRM
Elder Goth
Yeah, I reckon that's a fair point.
Brains and bodies are complicated things. It's no wonder they get confused and jumbled up.
monkers
Shaman
Monica's view was a little more nuanced that. Part of her reasoning came from her innate sense of self not in terms of her gender identity but via her sexuality in terms of whether she felt more intimate with men or with women. You might reason that sense came from a place of just being about bodies but it wasn't - it was more about the conduct of men as a group. She used to laugh and express it with humour and somewhat crudely because it felt that saying it this was made it more relatable - ''it isn't so much the dick I'm worried about, but the dick it's attached to''. And while this almost inevitably led her to have relationships only with women, there were men that she could ''almost fancy''. She used to talk about a gardener at one time at one place she worked at, saying if had both been single, she was sure they would have connected. He wasn't effeminate she said, but emotionally intelligent in a way that women more are.
My gender identity is strongly innate in and to me. I never have to think about who I may or not be attracted to romantically - my innate identity is more connected to trust issues having been abused by both parents. So I guess there I am admitting that part of my identity results for emotional and physical abuse as a child, but I'm just one person, and it would very wrong to think that queer identities always emanate from abuse.
The word 'innate' gets questioned and ''what can you mean by that?'' The answer is to realise that human sentience is bound up in earliest memories along a period of time and how powerful they remain. Abuse for children is inevitably a powerful memory. My innate sense comes from early memories of rejecting the idea that I am a boy. So I know that there will be people following on saying ''oh, you've just got Daddy issues''. That word ''just'' is doing a lot of work there, but it wasn't just about him, because what followed was the realisation that my mother was manipulated by him, controlled by him, and she was not just compliant but complicit.
I also learnt early on about male conduct, and the nomalisation of it in society, and it's acceptance. I never wanted to be part of that group.
Please don't criticise me for being where I am for joining the 'other side'. For many of you, there are only two sexes and no genders. From my perspective this can not be correct, and where men make claims that this is the only position, I only see this through the lens of men as a group being determined abusers, who justify abuse through their 'manhood'. It is power play demonstrated by their natural tendency to use all means including, and not just resorting to abuse, but an easy willingness to exercise that as a God-given freedom.
When I read this forum, I see this being playing out. The men here who know my past, have read my history of abuse, lecture me about them being all about protecting women and girls, talking about lifelong effects of gender affirming care, but then have this easy recourse to abuse, and to victim blaming. The talking points are bullshit - their own personas are the very model under which I refuse to be part of that collective. I am loathe to use that expression ''but not all men obviously'', because not only is it not all men, it is not even a majority of men. When I assert myself here, is followed not by them collapsing to reason, but asserting that I can not exist because it does not fit within the absolutist framework that they have absorbed.
I have a real and deep sympathy for real men - I mean men who know it is wrong to be mean - I can make a distribution of forum posters almost into two distinct groups. The interesting part is that the real men are comparatively quiet, just popping their heads up in defiance to the noise of the other group now and again when things go a bit far.
As for the noisy group, these are men playing the innocent in defiance of their natures, they are cosplaying at being real men - they are weak.
Yes, I am aware of the shitstorm that follows here for me, for they have little emotional intelligence, and no capacity for introspection.
So @icowden, you sit somewhere in the middle of these two groups, because you are somewhat sympathetic, but your ongoing belief that gender identity issues are connected with mental illness. I can only speak with authority in my case -you are incorrect - my identity is wrapped up in survival. My identity is not mental illness, it is the opposite, it is a defiance that holds off what would otherwise become a mental illness. If I was to live in a state that can not respect that while all the while speaking fine words about the abuses of men, while all the while calling my identity invalid, then the state itself is abusive. It is why I no longer have a place on 'TERF island'. I think it within you Ian to reflect, and perhaps you will.
I live without mental illness because I cling to what I was taught, that every person has a right to self-determination and a right to the full development of their personality. Frankly the idea that people are forced by others to declare the content of their pants/knickers so that people can lazily stereotype is an abuse of all people not just trans people. I've never been through a male puberty, I do not have male genitals. I am person, like any other whose character is the product of their mind - person and personality. A person's character is not determined soley by genitals, otherwise the 'TERFs' win on the basis that ''all men are abusive bastards'' with that little caveat - ''well not all men obviously''.
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BoldonLad
Old man on a bike. Not a member of a clique.
- Location
- South Tyneside
Most women I know (yes, I am aware, not a statistically significant sample) regard menstruation as nuisance, so, "why would you want to pretend?", but, what would I know?
icowden
Pharaoh
Yes, I appreciate that - I was trying to do a potted summary :-)
Of course. There does often seem to be a link though.
No criticism was intended (I suspect that you weren't aiming that at me though).
I'm sure you must appreciate that many would see that as an aspect of mental illness though?
But you must concede that as the person you are, you made the decision to undergo medical procedures for the benefit of your mental health. It must take a great deal of courage to do that, and I'm not intending to diminish or demean here. Your early life experiences must have been truly awful.
Thank you again for sharing. I appreciate that it also takes a great deal of courage to share your personal experience and I always find it interesting and informative. I do think we should all appreciate that we have the opportunity to talk to you as someone who has direct experience of transition and the huge difficulties and lack of acceptance that that can often come with.
icowden
Pharaoh
I think it might be the same reason that the President of the USA is convinced that an election was won fraudulently, that he's the greatest President of all time etc.